"Of Course I Was Asleep.It's 3 In The Morning. Well I'm Awake Now..."

I guess I'm the guy to call at 3am. Not that I mind, mind you. I just find it funny that I've got call-waiting beeping at me in the dead of night while I'm chatting with a drunk friend. I go to answer and its another drunk friend. 15 minutes later a third, and so on into the night.
I'd love to claim massive popularity, but I think maybe I'm the only guy who answers his phone in the dead of night.

He's An Alright Writer Though

Never ever ever EVER listen to anything by Chuck Klosterman on audiobook.
The man has very deft and insightful things to say, but when he reads them out loud his voice will make you want to beat his smart ass to death. I swear to fuck, he is the whiniest little fuck in the world.

If I Had A Baby She'd Have Sauce

Its noon on a Friday. I have the day off work, a bottle of vodka and some OJ. I'm looking forward to a relaxing day, sippin on screwdrivers and napping. But then of course I listen to "Gimme Some Lovin'" by G. Love and Special Sauce. Now all I can think about is sex.
Damnit.

I Wish I Was A G6

There are a few hard parts about living life with a go-for-it always attitude and balls to the wall intensity. One big one is burnout. It takes a lot out of a person to never stop running around and only slow down only long enough to catch their breath.
Another one is planning for the future. Its hard to justify spending time on long-term plans if those plans don't dovetail with carpe-ing every ounce from every diem.
Which brings me to my current block; deciding what it is I actually want to do.
I have some free time, a perfect amount for a jaunty trip to Hipster City, or Las Vegas, or anywhere in North America really. And I have the money of course, but I don't think my hearts in it at the moment. I'm tired and I'll be heading down to Atlanta in a few days anyway. My bank account could use a breather and I'm sure my liver could too. Not to mention the idea of being stuck on another series of planes across the country abhors me.
So I suppose I'll just take it easy here in the big ELP this weekend and try not to think of all the fun Ill be missing everywhere else. I just hope I don't wake up Saturday morning kicking myself in the head.

You'd Think With All That Whiskey Hemingway Would Have Been A Worse Writer

I find that when I get distracted during writting I lose focus.
I just wrote a pretty decent 10 paragraphs but couldn't remember the ending I had in mind when I started. Oh well.

Meet The New Boss, Same As The Old Boss

Election Night in A-MUR-ica. Smells like democracy at work. Yay!

What does that mean? Well right now it means the Rebublican party will take control of the House, the Democrats will probably have control of the Senate and I'm gonna be hungover as shit tommrow. See on election days I have a few traditions.
First comes is not voting, then baiting people to harrass me about my responsibility as an American to vote. Nothing makes me happier than someone lecturing me on civic responsibiliy. Call me crazy but I feel like I fufill my civic duty by defending the body politc at large, while those that love to lecture tend to not. Is this a jerk-ass thing to do? Yes, yes it is. Ask me if I give a fuck.
Then I sit around work and find out exactly why it is any given person identifies with their chosen politcal party. This is super-fun in the Army where no one understands anything other than Rebublicans=Yay Army, Democrats=Yay Black Presidents. (I swear this is really how it is.)
Last comes getting wasted and watching CNN while talking politics to other drunk people. As far as I've seen its just about the only way any of it matters is if you're an idealist or drunk. And the only way I can converse with the former is to be the latter.
So I always wake up the first Wednesday in November with a wicked hangover and a re-affirmed conviction that Pete Townshend is neck-and-neck with Tom Petty and Bob Dylan insofar as being a lyrical genius is concerned.


(For the record I am a registered voter in the Commonwealth of Virginia. I maintain the ability to vote, but choose not to.)

He Also Enjoys Hitting People In The Face With Chairs

Today a co-worker said something along the lines of; what would you do if you had a boatload of money. As in after you bought a few cars and a big house and whatever. He said you'd be bored as fuck after a while. When people disagreed he asked them what they did over leave. He said we had 30 days off work and a few paychecks, and after two weeks at home or off work we were bored.
I laughed at him because I wasn't. Oh sure some afternoons around the house I did get kinda bored, but pretty soon Patty would come home or I'd go out and meet friends after work. But more so than that, when I had the time and the money I went to China. I took a bite out of life in a way that just doesn't occur to people like my coworker.
Guys and gals like him are just too practical I think. They just don't understand how you can just "go to China". And its not like he had a lot of other things to do. He has no kids, he's not in debt and he had the time off. Maybe he doesn't want to go to China (or wherever) but he also doesn't want anything like that. He wants to work 5 days a week and go party on the weekends He wants to drink some beers while watching a football game on Sundays. He wants to see his family at Christmas and sleep with his girlfriend every night.
I'm not saying there is anything wrong with any of those things. I want some of them too. But that's all he seems to want. He doesn't want to travel, he doesn't want to jump out of a plane or hunt boar with a sharp stick and a buck knife. He has no desire to go backpacking or hiking or camping in strange ass places. He doesn't want to read philosophy or see The Pillowman preformed on stage. He doesn't give a shit about those kind of things I suppose.
To me that's alien. I want everything, all the time. I want everything I said and more. I want a home and a girl to love. I want to have a purpose in life too. But I also want adventure. I want good adventure and bad adventure and funny adventure and scary adventure. I want to be an old man that you can tell has done just about everything and I won't mind at all if it shows. I'll take facial scars and leathery skin and bad knees down the road for to see and do the things I have seen and done. And the greatest thing about it is I'm just getting warmed up.