Why do I like to drink so much? Sometimes I think about it and get all caught up in high-handed bullshit. Like because I can't deal with my life, or because I'm lonely or maybe its a side effect of being a borderline sociopath.
(I say 'borderline' but if you look up the criteria I fit almost all of them and exhibit almost all the symptoms as well. And it could be that I am just being a mental hypochondriac and I'm not a sociopath. But to be perfectly honest almost all of the people I know have the same symptoms. Which begs the questions; Is the definition for Antisocial Personality Disorder too broad, is it a bullshit disorder, is the sample population with which I draw from ie Upper-Middle Class young people/ young male Infantry soldiers predisposed to this disorder, is the prevalence understated, or do I just have a tendency to surround myself with sociopaths?)
But now I seem to have gotten way off topic. Drinking. So as stated I tend to lose myself in the wilderness of my mind when I search for the reason of my drinking, but I might have found away around that; I like to drink because its FUN. Yep, there it is. I don't know/care the reasons behind it, I don't give a fuck for the chemistry and my brain functions, I just know that I have fun when I'm drunk as a skunk. And it really doesn't bother me that I can't recall what I did yesterday or that I passed out before 10pm, occupational hazards of being a drinker I suppose. But to be honest I guess drinking is less of an occupation and more of a hobby; no one pays me to drink. Though they will once I leave the Army.
Yes ladies and gentleman, the US Military will give you a sweet check if you can prove that you have been injured while in service. And our lovely military considers alcoholism an injury, so if I can prove (simply by going to the Army Substance Abuse Program) that I am an alcoholic then they will pay me a disability check. Who needs government bailouts when you have government loopholes. Fuck, my 1st Sgt. heard of a guy who got 75% pay for sleep apnea, that is some serious dough for a bullshit condition.
In any case I have wandered away again and I have to go take a shower and start my day so I'll just close this one out. And it turns out I bought 6 bags of Cheez-It's from the vending machine last night and ate them in bed. Funny thing is, our vending machine doesn't take dollar bills so I must have found 6 dollars in change somewhere...